As we all have experienced, 2020 will be a year to remember, walking through a pandemic, financial burdens, not able to see love ones, riots, and I am sure the list of events can go on for each one of us.
Personally, there have been some fantastic wins and some profound valleys during this season.
I never thought I would help teach a child to learn at home. Learning to help home school back in March was a challenge for our family and continues to be. But the challenge is worth it. We are growing closer as a family. Alex was in grade two when the school closed, and now he is enrolled in online learning grade three. I am amazed at how much he knows about the computer as we started his online homework yesterday. This grandma is going to really need to rely on the Holy Spirit to teach her a deeper understanding of grace. A bonus of staying at home to learn, notice Alex has no shoes or socks on!
As I have mentioned in earlier posts, I have enjoyed bike riding with my family over the summer. Also, I have been walking along the river, and praying has been refreshing and healing for my soul. I found a new whispering place which is on the Meswasin trail. Prayer is a lifeline to God, and as I enjoy the outdoors, healing comes to my soul and body.
Planning for the fall has been tough with not knowing what September would bring.
At the end of June, I found out I would need to have brain surgery in September. For ten years, my doctor has been closely watching an aneurysm located in the font region of my brain. Because of the size that it has grown, it could rupture at any moment. The suggested procedure is endovascular coiling. I did not expect to be having brain surgery this year and felt rather shocked by the news.
Then a few weeks later, I experience severe abdominal pain and found out I will need to have another surgery right after the brain surgery. All I can say is, "What a crazy year!" On September 16, I will have a CT Scan for both procedures. From what I have been told, the brain surgery could be either on September 23 or 30, 2020. Hopefully, I will know the date for this first surgery by September 18.
In a previous post, I mentioned I was once again in a waiting period, similar to the waiting that took place before heart surgery. Each waiting period is different. Over the summer, I wrestled with fear. Numerous times over the last few months, I would open scripture, and the words, "Do not be afraid," screamed at me! I have been working through the book of proverbs this summer. I desire to learn what it means to walk with wisdom. A few days ago, these words from Proverbs 9:10 spoke to my heart concerning fear.
"Fear of the Lord is the foundation of wisdom. Knowledge of the Holy One results in good judgement."
How I have come to see fear is it can take me farther away from God, or it can take me closer. I have a choice. I can walk on a dark path or turn to the way that leads to life, learning who our God is. When I have a good understanding and knowledge of God, I will be able to stand in awe of Him. Fear of the Lord is not to be fearful, but to know He cares, and his love endures forever. I am choosing to let fear lead me home to my Fathers heart, where I can take refuge and find peace even when the storms of life are whirling all around me.
A few years ago, a friend gave me a mug that changes colours when you add warm water. It goes from dark indigo to bright life-giving shades of colour. I compare this to how it is with God's word. I can choose to walk my journey alone, or I can pick up His word and let it bring light and life into my soul. The warmth of knowing God loves me brings hope and life.
As usual, during hard journeys, I have an album and song which bought calm and peace on many days. The album is “Where His Light Was” and the song is “Fear Not” by Kristene DiMarco. Click here to listen. The other song that spoke to my heart during this season is “Take Courage.” Click here to listen.
A gift you can give my family over this crazy time is the gift of intercession.
Blessings and stay safe,
Robin
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